How To Respond to Accusations in a Godly Way.

There was a time in my life when I was thriving.

My ministry, Truly Beautiful, had become a huge part of my life. My days were filled with listening to people’s stories and struggles, sending emails, responding to messages, writing blog posts, filming YouTube videos and writing Instagram captions on a daily basis. It was often a heavy load to bear when people came to me with their struggles. They would ask me to write a blog post on “this” or an Instagram caption on “that.” Sometimes, people came to me ready to take their own lives. I would pray and grab my bible and pray again for any words God would give me to write in that exact moment. Taking these needs and bringing them to the Lord, asking Him for the words to speak into their lives. It was an honor. I loved living where God had me and being used in the gifts He’d given me. Although hard, I learned to simply rest in the fact that I couldn’t do this without Him. Him constantly cleaning me and ridding me of distractions, filling me with His words and opening up doors for me to share it. I was thankful for where I was.

But, I woke up one day and a new struggle began. One that would lead me on an amazing journey of revelation, one of which I get to share with you today.

From a few of the people I loved and was closest to, I was attacked.

My blog, my instagram, my ministry. I was accused of being “fake” and “just using my ministry for attention.”

I was crushed.

Mostly, because I never expected to be hurt so deeply by those I loved so deeply.

And another part of me, hurting because I KNEW that I wasn’t doing this for “fun.” Or “attention.” I didn’t “receive” anything from this ministry, other than knowing I was in my God-calling.

The accusations, brought a deep fear within me.

A fear I should not have had.

A fear of man and what they would think.

I had been made fun of before for having too much of a “Jesus Instagram” and that I talked about Jesus too much. Someone told me I needed to quit posting such “deep” posts for someone my age. I had a lot of voices speaking over me.

The accusations, even above being made fun of, they are what hurt me the deepest. Knowing that someone thought the worst of me and that was their opinion of me, shook me so deeply. I began monitoring my every word. Will this please people? Instead of asking, “Will this please God?”

My life could have easily become a show for people if not for God.

I could have focused all my time on pleasing people who would never be pleased.

But what would this accomplish?

I would strip myself to the very bottom to “please” people whose opinions and thoughts waver and change.

Instead, I should have been doing it “all for the glory of God.” (1 Cor. 10:31)

God grabbed my heart and gently spoke, “you are not alone.”

When I studied into scripture, I came to find out that there were those before me who had been chosen by God, gifted by God and were accused because of it.

Here are a few:

J E S U S.

He was unlike anyone. No one could seem to figure Him out. He overthrew money tables in the temples and allowed the little children to sit on His lap. He wore no crown, what kind of Messiah is He? (Matthew 27:12 – He didn’t even defend Himself.) Yet, because of the one who took on the form of a servant and was born in a manger, I am now saved and set free.

M A R Y.

She was young. Unmarried. What happened, shouldn’t have happened, in their eyes. I don’t know what kind of words they used, but I know their view of Mary wasn’t pleasant when she conceived before she was married. They didn’t understand her God-calling. But because of her obedience and courage, the world had a Savior.

J O S E P H.

Joseph was favored which brought jealousy to the hearts of his brothers. They mistreated him because of this jealousy. Joseph was living in his God-calling. They didn’t understand him or the dreams he had. Even in the palace, Joseph was accused and thrown in prison. The very same God-calling Joseph was living in, brought him hatred, accusations, and people to mistreat him. And that very same gift brought him leadership and fruition of dreams He had seen long ago.

People will not always understand. But God will direct you to where He wants to use you and how. It won’t always be easy. There will be a Pharoah’s wife and brothers who cast you in a pit. But there will also be a God who still has something greater for you. Keep using the gifts God has given you for His glory. Don’t stop because someone accuses you or discourages you. Your gift, might end up being what saves or helps the life of the very ones who hated you for it.

People’s accusations became stepping stones into what God has destined for their life. Accusations have no rule over the power of God.

If it hadn’t been for all of these accusations, the story could not have unfolded the way it did. Every accusation, is a writing in your book. You need every page, to complete the chapter. God doesn’t waste anything.

People will always have opinions. They will change often. God’s word WILL NOT change. When you are anchoring yourself firmly to the word of God, you are secure and will not be wavered. What He says, is what you live by.

What To Do When Someone Accuses You:

• TAKE IT TO GOD. I cannot stress this enough! God knows the deepest parts of our hearts and sees things we cannot see on our own. Sometimes, the accusations can be good. They may lead us to get rid of something or change something in our lives for the better. Sometimes accusations, are actually RIGHT. God is there to help you in this time and guide you.

• Read God’s word. Know what He says. Align your thoughts with a biblical perspective. Write His words and truths on the table of your heart. Never let someone else’s words override the word of God. His word never changes.

• Go to wise mentors, parents or leaders in your life. Ask them for prayer and advice on how you can walk this situation out in a God-honoring way. They may have some encouragement for you, some advice for you and may speak things over you that change your perspective. And it’s always wonderful to have people praying for you and your heart towards people.

• Let God’s perfect love tear down any walls placed up. Don’t let bitterness set in. Pray for the people who accuse you. Pray for your heart towards them. Don’t let hate determine how you see someone to treat them. Love them like Jesus would. No conditions attached.

• Don’t gossip. Don’t tell everyone about how horrible they are. Sometimes it’s best just not to say anything at all. Don’t attach their names to the situation, if you decide to share what happened in the right way, with the right person, at the right time. Don’t insinuate it was “this person” who accused you. Don’t try to bring shame or dishonor to someone. Don’t spread your unforgiveness and hatred to someone else’s heart, for them to carry. Go about it in a wise and God-honoring way. Guard your tongue diligently.

• Don’t try to “prove your point” to someone in a sneaky way. Guess what? I did that. A few months ago, someone accused me of something that really hurt my feelings. What did I do? I posted immediately about it on Instagram in a non “I’m posting this for you” way. Do you know what happened? The girl blocked me and our friendship suffered because of it. It’s okay to share encouragement (such as this blog post) from situations that happened, but not to shove it in someone’s face or to “call them out.” There are some things that DO need to be shared and spoken. But not in a condemning way. Only in a way that is truly meant to honor the Lord and obey His commands. Speaking the truth in love. (Ephesians 4:15).

Proverbs 29:25

The fear of man bringeth a snare:

but whoso putteth his trust in the Lord shall be safe.

1 Peter 3:9

Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.

1 Peter 3:14

But and if ye suffer for righteousness’ sake, happy are ye: and be not afraid of their terror, neither be troubled;

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15 thoughts on “How To Respond to Accusations in a Godly Way.

  1. Wow. This was an excellent post. Thank you for sharing your heart, Abby! I was touched. In my early teens, I was given some painful accusations and negativity towards my piano playing and some other surrounding issues the person had with me. I was taken aback and extremely discouraged by what happened, and it took me months to build bridges back and get over the fears caused by the accusation. I chose to forgive, but even today I can feel the tension when I talk with this person.
    A lesson I gleaned from this time was to be more cautious and thoughtful about life and ministry in general. Perhaps I wasn’t “worthy” of these accusations, or deserving of the discouragement I was given. But God still gives us these trials to learn + grow, so having a teachable spirit is very important!
    Oh, and for the record, your ministry is a BLESSING. I check your blog and Lovely Letters Instagram daily. I am always encouraged and you always put a smile on my face. You are truly setting a whole new example for doing HARD THINGS. And you inspire me!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. You’re so right about God using these trials to teach us + grow! I grew more in that time than I would have ever thought and I wouldn’t trade those lessons for anything! And awe, thank you Grace! That is so encouraging, I appreciate you!

      Like

  2. Wow! This was probably my favorite post on here! Not that I’m glad about what happened, but it encouraged me to do what God wants, even when people don’t like it. Like you said, people’s opinions waver. God will always be the same. Thank you!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Thanks for the advice! I’ve lost friends and had things said about me that were not even remotely true. I am so sorry your ministry was attacked! One thing that always helps me is that I remember one of my favorite scriptures, John 15:19. It helps me understand that not everyone is going to love me as He does and that it doesn’t mean I should be ashamed if I am doing the right thing.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Sometimes I think I post a lot about God on my personal Instagram and that’s kinda weird compared to others, but this reminded me that standing for Jesus in love is worth it!! Thanks for this amazing post. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Don’t ever feel like you have to fit the mold! If you post about Jesus all the time, it’s just because you live your life for Him! You’re not ashamed to live for Him.:) and that’s a beautiful thing! I’m thankful for all of the beautiful and encouraging posts you do! You never know who they impact!

      Liked by 2 people

  5. I’ve been reading blogs by several young ladies that WordPress somehow started recommending. I’m glad He brought yours across my path, Abby.

    Hang on to your Lord no matter where your journey takes you – mountains to deserts. Romans 8:28 means ALL things. He has proven that to me countless times in the 46 years I’ve known Him. Through some extremely difficult circumstances – many caused by others. I have found praying for those who mean harm to me the most freeing thing to do. I’ve even been blessed to see one ‘enemy’ re-enter my life years down the road – having found Jesus! God is SO amazing!

    Stay focused on your Lord & immerse yourself in the Word & prayer. I know He is going to continue to use you & your writing as you stay focused on Him.

    Liked by 1 person

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